Blog Standard Stuff

Well, I was gonna write something witty about this but it’s 1:30am and my to-do list remains long and ‘to-be-done’ so I’m just gonna post this ‘charming’ email I received earlier from a nutbag who went from asking nicely for some help with something on my book to completely flipping and being abusive. Spelling errors are all his, natch:

Ya no, Ian–

You should proofread your book and TEST
each section before you presume to get money
by publishing it.
The last half of chapter 5 is a total fiasco.
Where do the URLs refer to ??????

You assume toooooo much.
I’m angry with you.
Maybe I should shit can yhour book and gbet myh montyt back. and go lto another book!!!!!!

To which I replied:

You should proofread your book and TEST
each section before you presume to get money
by publishing it.

I can assure you that each and every chapter is proof-read at several different stages.

The last half of chapter 5 is a total fiasco.
Where do the URLs refer to ??????

The images - assuming you are referring to the background images with various effects - are relative to the document that refers to them. These are in the complete code archive in chapter 4 - examples > background images. As ***** at SitePoint confirmed the other day, those examples should have been titled so you know where to find them and this will be addressed in any revision.

You assume toooooo much.
I’m angry with you.
Maybe I should shit can yhour book and gbet myh montyt back. and go lto another book!!!!!!

And you apparently feel that the way to ask for feedback is to be downright rude. I have one message from you which I received this morning that I was going to respond to personally this evening and I have been nothing but personable and helpful. However, your attitude towards me I find frankly disgusting. I have written a book that has received very good feedback from other beginners and do not expect to have to deal with this.

Next time you have problems, ask nicely - you’ll get far better results.

Well, could I possibly have expected it to end there? Or nicely? Well, whaddyathink? ;-)

Well, if you’re put off by "rudeness" you’re in the wrong business.
Moreover, only homosexuals and women are "put off" by "rudeness".
Which are you?
Parenthetically, only mad dogs and Englishmen go out in the mid-day heat.
How’s THAT for rudeness?
If you can’t handle the heat, get out of the kitchen and volunteer for Iraq.
How’s that for additional rudeness?

Nice, eh? I bet you’re all looking forward to the day that this fine gentleman learns the ropes of web design and starts pitching for work aren’t you. I wasn’t trying to feed the troll, honest - he just helped himself!

What would you do if you got a note like this - particularly after you offered to help said ‘gentleman’ with the issues he was having?

Jesus H Christ. Am I the only person in this country who’s absolutely fucking sick to the back teeth of seeing England flags attached to the rear bumpers, rear windscreens or back windows (on crappy little plastic white flagpoles that are wedged in the wound-up window) on seemingly every third car at the moment?

Folks, you live in England, and unless you are actually foreign it’s probably a given that you want England to do well in the World Cup, so the plastering of the England flag over every conceivable space is really not necessary (please, somebody tell the likes of Asda Walmart which insists on devoting entire aisles to this shitty merchandise). Oh, and this news just in, sportsfans – the feckin’ World Cup hasn’t even started yet!

To take a drive around town of a weekend, anyone would think the world cup had actually started and people were celebrating the winning team’s victory, but sorry to tell you that you’ve got another couple of weeks until you have a license to decorate your cars like the prize idiots you are.

If you want to support the team, do it the old-fashioned way by going down the pub, queuing for the first half of the game, making your way back to the only spot in the bar where you can see the one-fifth of the projection TV screen, only to spill half of your drink as England score a goal and the crowd erupts. Before realising that the goal is ruled off-side.

An interesting question. How about ‘may you go boil yer own head you bunch of frickin’ morons‘.

I dunno, it was all looking so promising when they actually appeared to be asking permission before whacking a whole bunch of spam pharmacy links in the comments field. Jeez, this stuff just never ends

To anyone who left a comment here and wondered why I, with my distinct lack of commentors, would not deem it sensible to allow yours though. I am sorry, too, that I am such a dumbass not to realise why the reason that no-one commented was *not* because no-one had commented, but rather that I’d never discovered the ‘Comment Moderation’ area in Wordpress.

232 comments awaiting moderation.

Eeek!

I really should look around Wordpress.

And I really should get around to redesigning this flaming personal site of mine instead of using this off-the-shelf design.

So, I’m in Germany. Munich, to be precise. It’s getting late in the afternoon and the level of the sun is quite low. I’m trying to take a photo of a building in a square, one with archways and statues. Try as I might, I can’t quite squeeze it in without taking quite a few steps back. As I get to the point where the whole thing fits in the viewfinder, the sun peeks out over the top of the building causing lens flare. Damn. Back in the day I used to have a good SLR which I’d always keep a lens hood on for this very reason, but I’d have to improvise …

I looked at the screen of the digital camera and then put my hand out in front of the camera slightly, just over the top of the lens. It’s a fine art, blocking lens flare like this. My hand was in the picture, so I started moving the hand up, out, a little to the left, back to the right, just trying to find that sweet spot where the building was in view and the lens flare was eliminated. Finally, with my hand out at full stretch just above the camera , I got the correct spot - at last!

It was at this point that I realised I was standing in the streets of Munich doing what appeared to be a Nazi salute to a building that was a significant building in the Third Reich’s past.

Dean said: “I cut my teeth on a BBC Micro“.

And I cut my forehead when my pant elastic failed and I fell through a pane of glass in a door. I win.

On a plus point, these pants look to be up to the job:

Surely this woman must stake a claim on that?

Maybe that’s my shortfall, maybe that’s my ignorance … Nothing clicked in me. A kid in a bathtub is a kid in a bathtub.